Now that i have started “this”… made a mark on the blank page (or website, if you want to be particular).
“This” is currently hard for me to define… It is an exploration inwards and outward. It is an adventure. A journey.
I know with time and exploration, I’ll be able to define it. Refine it. Find the constants in the change. I never think it will be static, it will change as I do. It will continually change. An evolution, maybe Darwinian in nature. Or maybe, more like a relationship that deepens and changes over time but is built on a solid foundation, shared vision and is filled with love.
Right now, it feels like internet dating!
The nervousness and vulnerability that comes with putting yourself out there, mixed with the excitement and potential of a perfect match. I am trying things out. Seeing how they feel, seeing how they are received, seeing who they attract? People will be trying me out, feeling my words and feelings for a resonation. A connection.
The excitement in the flurry of dates and interest in who i am and do we click? We could have a great conversation and a good time. Despite how great a first date can be, you cannot know a person from that one meeting. Just like you cannot know me from one post…
When you get home from the date and the excitement wears off, doubts creep in…
Do you see where this goes? Or nip in in the bud? Or over time you see that despite an initial attraction, the differences are too great, the chemistry fades, or it just doesn’t feel right?
You can’t force it… But you can keep an open heart and open mind… and try again tomorrow (or read another post )
Like the blank page, I cannot promise greatness. I cannot promise you will always like what you read… But i do promise to try, with honesty and vulnerability and open heart and mind. To share my thoughts and experiences, so you can get to know me. Even one date, (or one post, read)… I will be happy with that because if nothing else it will have been a hour of my life well spent. Opening my self and connecting with others.
Can I buy you a virtual coffee sometime?
Disclaimer – I am happily married and not looking for dates… my husband reads this too.
Photo Credit - Laura Arrowsmith-Hudson 2014